A baby crawls on his mom in bed.

Trust your intuition. Live with intention.

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

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candleI actually didn’t know about this day until this morning, when our dear next door neighbor, who also experienced stillbirth at full term, posted about it on Facebook.  But alas, it turns out we have our own “holiday”, as she put it – a dismal, dreary kind of day that usually includes candlelit walks and I imagine, a fair amount of wine.

I don’t know if a day like today is more for those who have suffered such a loss, or for those who haven’t – a way to help them see, to know.   Some kinds of grief aren’t easily validated in our culture, and people instinctively rush the healing process, moving on for the sake of the world around them.  Many people never know about those around them who have lost a child, or at least never get a chance to acknowledge it.

Which is Worse

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 A couple of hours before we were ready to leave the nurses asked us how we would prefer to part ways with Rowan.  The absurdity of this question will forever haunt me – as if there is a way I would “prefer” to say goodbye to my son, forever goodbye.